Duke Cannon’s Big Ass Brick of Soap is the coolest soap you’ve never heard of, let alone actually used to clean your mangina.

In an era where men’s body wash gels have taken over, Duke Cannon’s Big Ass Brick of Soap is truly that; it’s a big, green piece of soap that has a big “D” (imprinted on it, you perv) and weighs three-quarters of a pound.

Once Duke and I hit the shower after a long day at the orifice, Duke cleaned all my orifices in the most pleasing manners allowed by law. The soap also had these little yellow pieces of steel cut grains imbedded in it. Purportedly used for “maximum gripability,” they also worked to exfoliate and scrub dead skin from your body; you know, if you swing that way.

Read the full review here.