I know shaving your face is being marketed as an “experience,” a “moment for yourself.” But out of 100 shaves, how many times do you treat it like a spa day the way hot babes and high-rolling Atlantic City sweathogs do? Exactly.
At the time, I loved it. So much in fact, that I babied my supply, even cutting it with water when I ran low, the way you fill up your parent’s vodka from the liquor cabinet in high school.
In that eight months, I tried every conceivable aftershave and post shave incarnation, some high-end, though mostly sleazy and easily accessible. And all that time, I was really longing for Dreadnought.
I tried to deny it, but nothing was as good in the interim, or even now. Finally, tail between my legs, I reached back out to Dreadnought.
I was going to publish the actual email, but it was so #WeakSauce, so sappy, it was embarrassing, and it still is. I’d prefer you continue to think of me as a man, not some blathering, near-woman idiot, gassed up on chardonnay and scorn.
What did I like about it? What was so great about it that made me long for its touch? Here are three “quickies”:
1) The slick skin afterglow of a bygone era
2) The texture
3) A dab will fill up your entire face
To some people, Alexis DeJoria is the wife of Moster Garage star Jesse James. To others, she is the daughter of Jean-Paul DeJoria, billionaire businessman and co-founder of Paul Mitchell hair products and the Patron Spirits Company. But on the NHRA Mello Yello circuit, Alexis DeJoria is one of the most successful Funny Car drivers on the tour.
We spent two days with Alexis and her team from Kalitta Motorsports at the Kansas Nationals at Heartland Park in Topeka, Kansas, and inadvertently found ourselves in the middle of the most exciting weekend in the history of the sport.
In this video, Alexis talks about how her car accelerates faster than anything on earth (yes, even a fighter jet), how she got into racing, and her career-defining victory in the 2014 NHRA U.S. Nationals, it’s 60th anniversary, a feat akin to winning the Super Bowl.
The day before we arrived in Topeka, during the second day of qualifying, DeJoria ran the best run of her career, an Elapsed Time (ET) of 3.994. ET is the time it takes from the car to get from the starting line to finish line.
Nothing worse than looking like an idiot in front of your friends at a young age.
“So you wana act grown…well now you can look grown too,” said barber Russell Fredrick on the Facebook page for his A-1 Kutz barbershop in Snellville, Georgia, near Atlanta.
Fredrick shaved his son’s head bald and then showed him a picture of an old bald man, like the character in “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button.”
“I showed him and I told him, this is your next one if you keep it up,” Fredrick told him. “He didn’t want it, so he got his act together.”
You know what’s really annoying? About 99% of the announcers on TV, especially during the NBA playoffs.
That’s why I’m stoked to tell you about Rabble.TV. These guys let you listen to playoff audio broadcast done by die-hard fans – just like you. Just mute your TV and crank up Rabble to start listening to announcers that actually know what they’re talking about.
What’s just as cool is that you can announce the games tonight yourself. I mean, if you’re hanging out with your buddies, drinking beers, and cracking jokes, why not broadcast the hilarity for the entire world to hear. You know you want to!
Here’s How To Win:
- Listen to an audio broadcast of any NBA Playoffs game or call the game yourself.
- Let us know in the comments section below which announcer you dislike the most and why
- We’ll select the winner with the funniest comment
- We’ll contact the winner and ship out the Curry or James jersey to your doorstep (jersey subject to availability on Fanatics).
And check out this video the company made. I’m pretty sure we can all relate to how much it sucks listening to crappy announcers who spew out the same boring clichés.
Confidence opens doors that nothing else can. But confidence can also be misplaced. How do you know if the shirt you’re wearing is completely ridiculous until you actually wear it outside the house? Thanks to Speed Stick, at least I had confidence in my underarm scent.
But confidence was definitely not lacking for driver Cole Whitt. Even though Front Row Motorsports is at a distinct disadvantage, operating on one-eighth the budget of its competitors and Whitt’s highest previous finishing position this season a modest 22nd, Whitt was ready.
A Top 20 finish at Talladega would’ve meant a lot, as Cole explains in our interview below, shot immediately before the race. But Whitt was able to #DefyTheDoubt and lead the entire field with under 40 laps remaining en route to his best performance this season. Speed Stick is all about giving you confidence for the moment you shut down the naysayers, as Whitt did finishing a career-best 13th in the race.
I got a little excited during my interview, and it isn’t completely my fault – there’s so much energy at a NASCAR race, it permeates the grounds and is as real as the guy with the Dale Jr. shirt on next to you.