Product Review: Schick Quattro Titanium

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For its latest campaign, Schick has taken a direct position against hipster douchebags. And I say it’s high time.

In recent years, the hipster population has exploded in the same way Ted Nugent says the deer population has, because there are no natural predators. Society has embraced these wayward idiots in tight pants with ironic tattoos, such as a flying toaster or a piece of pizza.

But now, Schick has positioned itself as a hipster predator. No, not this guy, but the thought of the original Predator hunting down hipster doofuses in major metropolitan areas the way he hunted down Danny Glover in Predator 2, does get me a little excited. Read the rest of this entry »

  

Patriots linebacker Jerod Mayo and Old Spice working to end “overspraying epidemic”

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There’s a war going on that you may not even know about. We hear a lot about world events like missing Malaysian Airlines Flight 370, Syria and the Middle East. But one thing we don’t hear about is the overspraying epidemic that exists for 75% of guys.

Patriots All-Pro linebacker Jerod Mayo and Old Spice have teamed up to teach men how to scent responsibly and stop this epidemic the way Mayo stopped Ravens tight end Dennis Pitta in the 2013 AFC Championship.

“I’m actually on my way now to educate young guys at Boston University to teach them how to scent responsibly,” said Mayo, concern evident in his voice.

“They know how to drive responsibly, and do other things responsibly. It’s all about scenting responsibly in 2014. I’m very excited to help end the overspraying epidemic that’s happening now.”

One reason the problem has reached epidemic levels is ignorance; 68% of guys admit that no one had ever showed them how to apply body spray properly.

The first step is acceptance — realizing that you have an overspraying problem and then taking the necessary steps to move forward.

Mayo, Captain of the Patriots defense, is here to call out your defensive spray audible.

“There’s some rules you have to abide by. First off, it starts with a shower. You have to take a shower with your Old Spice gel. That helps gets the pores open so you can put on the Old Spice Refresh Body Spray. But the thing about Refresh is that you don’t need too much of it.”

Read the full interview here.

  

Top 10 Female Gold Digger Names

http://www.dreamstime.com/royalty-free-stock-image-woman-biting-wallet-image7294386

DirtSearch.org, a free background check that searches public, criminal, arrest, civil, speeding tickets and more, has just released the top 10 female gold digger names and the list puts Jennifer on top. For anybody who has ever known a Jennifer, this is no big surprise.

DirtSearch.org pulled data from over 2 million background searches and looked closely at the female names most often searched.

Out of that list, the names that come up most often in the top 10 are Jennifer, Jessica and Michelle, followed by Lisa and Ashley.

Here are the Top 10:
1. Jennifer
2. Jessica
3. Michelle
4. Lisa
5. Ashley
6. Amanda
7. Melissa
8. Stephanie
9. Nicole
10. Angela

If you are dating a woman and are questioning if she has a shady past or are ais  qualified ‘gold digger’ just after your bank account, here are ways to tell:

1. A sense of entitlement: She thinks she is a princess and has no long-term or short-term goals. Search her first name and last name anonymously on a background search site such as DirtSearch.org. Sites such as that one searches through online public records based on an algorithm and aggregates data across the internet to find what is listed online.

2. Trouble paying their bills: Gold diggers drop hints that they may be evicted or their car might be repossessed when instead they are buying $400 shoes and watches.

3. Age range: The girl is 30 years younger than you but tells you that she is 15 years younger.

4. She never pays for anything.

5. She is into expensive and lavish gifts. The girl asks you to pay for nails, hair and lavish trips.

6. They indulge in a pipe dream. She is constantly talking about becoming an actress or a model.

Check out DirtSearch.org by following this link.

Photo Credit: © Dmitri Mihhailov | Dreamstime.com

  

Product Review: Vaseline Men Spray Lotion

The new Vaseline Men Spray Lotion came to me in a time of need. My skin was drier than the driest Norm McDonald joke. So dry, in fact, that had my friends known, my new name would’ve been “Ashley” rather than Paul because I was so ashy.

Sure, the combination of Vaseline with a spray-on lotion lends itself perfectly to a masturbation joke. But guys, I’m not going to tug your chain — this stuff works.

Vaseline Men Spray Lotion is available in two formulas: Fast Absorbing and Fast Cooling.

Spray-on lotion may sound like a gimmick, but it’s actually really useful for certain troublesome areas. For me, one such area is the top middle of my back.

I’ve gotten used to glopping an excessive amount of lotion on my hand and sort of waywardly slapping it back there, usually with mixed results.

But the continuous “spray-ability” of Vaseline Men Spray Lotion allowed me to zero in on an area I couldn’t have otherwise reached. No, not that area, sir. I can reach there just fine, thank you.

Vaseline Men Spray Lotion absorbed into my skin faster than any lotion I have ever used. And there wasn’t a slimy residue that made my clothes stick to the area I covered; at least not from the spray lotion, anyway.

Read the full review here.

  

Product Review: Schick Hydro 5 Sensitive Collection

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The Schick Hydro 5 Sensitive Collection had all the sensitivity of a toddler petting a kitten on a pillow with a rainbow in the background, while listening to Richard Marx’s hit power ballad, “Hold Onto the Nights.”

As a dude, shaving your chin is a delicate, sensitive process. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve nicked myself in that particular area based solely on excessive speed and a lack of tenderness.

Luckily, the Schick Hydro 5 Sensitive is here to save us from ourselves. The Ultra Glide Blades are equipped with Skin Guards (that would be a sweet band name) that smooth the surface of the skin while you shave. In the 20-plus shaves I used the product, it didn’t happen once. And I sped through my shaves like a young Apollo Ohno.

Since we’re being sensitive, I have a confession to make. Thanks to investing in high priced, high-end shaving creams (not to be confused with the Tribe Called Quest classic, “The Low End Theory”) over the years, I’ve tended to look upon Edge products with a jaundiced eye.

I mean, look at the people Edge hangs out with — Wal-Mart, Target and almost any other national retail chain. Edge will pretty much align itself with anyone that will have it, and those whoreish tendencies have never been lost on me.

But, as with the case of many whores, there is also something that attracts you in the first place, no matter how many strange beds she’s laid in.

Read the full review here.

  

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