Product Review: Vaseline Men Spray Lotion

The new Vaseline Men Spray Lotion came to me in a time of need. My skin was drier than the driest Norm McDonald joke. So dry, in fact, that had my friends known, my new name would’ve been “Ashley” rather than Paul because I was so ashy.

Sure, the combination of Vaseline with a spray-on lotion lends itself perfectly to a masturbation joke. But guys, I’m not going to tug your chain — this stuff works.

Vaseline Men Spray Lotion is available in two formulas: Fast Absorbing and Fast Cooling.

Spray-on lotion may sound like a gimmick, but it’s actually really useful for certain troublesome areas. For me, one such area is the top middle of my back.

I’ve gotten used to glopping an excessive amount of lotion on my hand and sort of waywardly slapping it back there, usually with mixed results.

But the continuous “spray-ability” of Vaseline Men Spray Lotion allowed me to zero in on an area I couldn’t have otherwise reached. No, not that area, sir. I can reach there just fine, thank you.

Vaseline Men Spray Lotion absorbed into my skin faster than any lotion I have ever used. And there wasn’t a slimy residue that made my clothes stick to the area I covered; at least not from the spray lotion, anyway.

Read the full review here.

  

Product Review: WallMonkeys Custom Wall Decals

Paul-Eide-WallMonkeys

What is WallMonkey? A WallMonkey is a wall graphic created from an image and converted into a decal of variable sizes that are removable and reusable; think Fathead, but a higher quality material with any unlicensed image you select.

WallMonkeys started in 2008, and its primary purpose was to print wall graphics of kids playing sports for parents.

I thought, “What is the most ridiculous and obnoxious thing I could have blown up to cover the walls of my house?”

My mind immediately sprung to Austin Powers and his epic line from the movie, “Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery”: Please allow myself, to introduce….myself.”

What’s better than going to my house and seeing the real Paul Eide? Seeing a 48-inch WallMonkey of Paul Eide, while you’re engaged in a conversation with Paul Eide.

The hardest part was choosing an image of myself, to be viewed and enjoyed by myself.

Click here for the full review.

  

10 Best Lines to Pick Up Chicks On Vacation

Top-10-Pickup-Lines

The art of the pickup line is lost on certain babes, to be sure. But baby, if we get all sleazy with you, it’s only because we care.

Amazingly, sleaze turns into charm when it’s uttered in non-English.

With this in mind, your friends at One Hour Translation, a leading provider of human powered translation services around the world, have your back.

Think of One Hour Translation as a sex machine for words. They’ve actually taken the work out of it for you by assembling a list of the 10 best pick up lines to slay chicks on vacation, available in English, Spanish, Italian and French.

 

You’re single. I’m single. Coincidence? I think not.”

o   Tú eres soltera. Yo también. ¿Será coincidencia? No creo. –Spanish

o   Sei single. Sono single. Sarà una coincidenza? Io dico di no –Italian

o   Tu es célibataire. Je suis célibataire. Coïncidence ? Je ne pense pas. – French

 

      “Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?”

o   ¿Te dolió cuando te caíste del paraíso? –Spanish

o   Ti sei fatta male cadendo dal cielo? – Italian

o   Tu as eu mal quand tu es tombé de haut ? - French

 

I memorized every number in the phone book, but managed to lose yours. I’m going to need to get that.”

o   Me aprendí de memoria todos los teléfonos de la guía telefónica, pero resulta que se me olvidó el tuyo. Tendremos que remediar eso. – Spanish

o   Ho memorizzato ogni numero della mia rubrica, ma sono riuscito a perdere il tuo. Ho bisogno di ritrovarlo. – Italian

o   J’ai appris tous les numéros de l’annuaire, mais j’ai réussi à perdre le tien. Je vais en avoir besoin. – French

 

I don’t know if you know this, but you look a lot like my next girlfriend/boyfriend.”

o   No sé si te lo hayan dicho, pero te pareces mucho a mi próxima novia. – Spanish

o   Non so se lo sai, ma sembri la/il mia/o prossima/o ragazza/ragazzo. – Italian

o   Je ne sais pas si tu sais, mais tu ressembles beaucoup à mon ex petite amie / petit ami. – French

 

Are you a 90 degree angle? ‘Cause you’re looking right!”

o   ¿Eres un ángulo de 90 grados? ¡Porque te ves correcta! – Spanish

o   Sei un angolo di 90°? Perché in te vedo un angolo di cielo! – Italian

o   Es-tu un angle droit ? Parce que tu as l’air bien - French

 

       ”If I had to rate you from 1-10 I would rate you as a 9 because I am the one that you are missing.”

o   Si tuviera que calificarte del 1 al 10 te pondría 9, porque yo soy el uno que te falta. – Spanish

o   Se dovessi darti un giudizio da 1 a 10, ti darei 9, io sono la parte che ti manca per arrivare a 10. – Italian

o   Si je devais te donner une note entre 1 et 10, je te donnerais 9 car je suis le point qui te manque. – French

 

Do your legs hurt from running through my dreams all night?”

o   ¿Te duelen las piernas por haber corrido toda la noche en mis sueños? –Spanish

o   Non sei stanca? Ti ho vista tutta notte nei miei sogni – Italian

o   Est-ce que tu as mal aux jambes d’avoir couru dans mes rêves toute la nuit ? – French

 

Are you religious? Because you’re the answer to all my prayers.”

o   ¿Eres religiosa? Porque eres la respuesta a todas mis oraciones. – Spanish

o   Credi in Dio? Perché sei la risposta a tutte le mie preghiere – Italian

o   Tu es croyante? Parce que tu es la réponse à toutes mes prières. – French

 

Is that a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see myself in your pants.”

o   ¿Tienes un espejo en el bolsillo? Porque me veo metido en tus pantalones. – Spanish

o   Hai uno specchietto in tasca? Mi vedo riflesso nei tuoi pantaloni. – Italian

o   C’est  un miroir dans ta poche ? Parce que je me vois dans ton pantalon. – French

 

  “Do you know what my shirt is made of? Boyfriend material.”

o   ¿Sabes de que está hecha mi camisa? De material de novio. – Spanish

o   Sai di cosa è fatta questa camicia? Fibra di fidanzato. – Italian

o   Tu sais de quoi est faite ma chemise ? De tissu de petit ami. – French

 

If these pick-up lines aren’t enough to get the job done, Tweet @OHT and they will translate anything you’d like in real time! If you need more help than that, you’re doing it wrong, Brojam.

  

Degree Men Deodorant Launches “Clash of the Underdogs”

Degree NCAA

Which team provided the biggest underdog moment in NCAA history? 2013 Florida Gulf Coast? 1983 NC State? 1996 Princeton?

Degree Men deodorant launched “Clash of the Underdogs,” a series of brackets that place history’s favorite March Madness underdog victories against each other, and gives fans the chance to vote for the greatest of all time. Fans can visit www.DegreeBasketball.com and vote for their favorite NCAA March Madness “underdog moments,” and then register for the chance to win a trip to the 2015 NCAA Final Four in Indianapolis.

As the Official Locker Room Products of NCAA Championships, Degree Men wants to make sure that you are set for the March Madness frenzy and stay ahead of sweat and odor during those buzzer-beating moments. Try out the Degree Men limited edition NCAA basketball-themed Sport Defense stick which has new and improved MOTIONSENSE™ Technology.

It’s the only antiperspirant/deodorant that releases extra microcapsules when you start to move – not just when you start to sweat – protecting you from sweat and odor for 48 hours and allowing you to DO:MORE. The more you move, the more it protects.

For more information on Degree Men, visit the website, the Facebook page and the Twitter.com page. Fans can view the short film series on Stephen Curry on YouTube by clicking here.

  

Old Spice “Get Shaved in the Face” Electric Shavers & Trimmers

Old Spice Get Shaved In The Face

Old Spice has introduced its new lineup of Old Spice Electric Shavers and Trimmers powered by Braun, along with a new digital advertisement – “Get Shaved in the Face” – with actor (“Brooklyn Nine-Nine”) and Old Spice Guy, Terry Crews. And, the timing couldn’t be more perfect! 

 
Reasons to “Get Shaved In the Face” with new Old Spice Electric Shavers and Trimmers:
  • Old Spice Guy Terry Crews Said So – Terry Crews helped introduce new Old Spice Shave Gel last year, so he knows what he’s talking about. He also looks pretty intimidating with his shirt off.
  • First Day of Spring (March 20) – It’s time for guys to hibernate those nasty winter beards.
  • Beard Envy – With any new facial hair transplant comes the need for a new beard trimmer. Talk about taking advantage of a trend.

New Old Spice Electric Shavers and Trimmers:

  • Hair Clipper ($49.99) – Like a lawn mower for your hair with 8 adjustable settings.
  • Beard & Head Trimmer ($49.99) – Get your face and head shipshape with 12 adjustable settings for precisely trimmed beardstyles and hairstyles.
  • Wet & Dry Shave & Trim ($59.99) – This is the pocket knife of shavers for your face. Shave, trim and define with one tool, in and out of the shower.
  • Shaver ($69.99) – Like 3 smooth barbers for your face, this shaver features a triple-action cutting system with twin foils that shave off stubble and an integrated cutter that shortens longer hairs.
  • Wet & Dry Shaver ($79.99) – Features triple-action cutting system that’s tough on hair and smooth on skin. Can be used on land or at sea (in the shower) with Old Spice shave gel.

    For more information on the new shavers, visit oldspice.com.

  

Kobalt 40V Max Outdoor Power Equipment introduces BarbershopBlog to manhood!

Cobalt Plus 513

When I was a kid, I used to think the old guys who took care of their yards were losers. While I was zooming around the neighborhood smoking bowls in my car listening to Bone Thugs-n-Harmony, I thought it was pathetic how homeowners genuinely took pride in their lawns. Surely there was more to life than a new mower, hedge trimmer or edger, I surmised.

But now that I’m in my 30s and have become one of those losers, I’m here to tell you that there isn’t more to life than that.

In fact, it feels awesome to manicure your lawn, tend your garden, and then blow the clippings off of your driveway with a leaf blower upon completion. It makes the iced tea I enjoy in my folding lawn chair post-yardwork taste that much more crisp, the AM talk radio that bellows out of my open garage that much more insightful, and the episodes of “Wheel of Fortune” that I have on DVR for post-lawn enjoyment that much more stirring.

But do you know what does suck about lawn maintenance? Inadequate, cumbersome tools.

What if outdoor power equipment (OPE) tools were easy to use? What if they were actually enjoyable? What if when you were done, you felt good about yourself and your yard?

The engineers at Kobalt have not only delivered a ground-breaking collection of OPEs, but they’ve done it with empathy in mind.

Read the full review experience here.

  

Product Review: RumbaTime Bowery Watch Collection

rumba_2

It’s “time” to get a watch, playa. Rich people wear watches. If you’re trying to get your paper right, get a badass watch and show some fools “what time it is.”

A new survey from Spectrem Group’s Millionaire Corner shows most wealthy investors wear wristwatches (67 percent), with the percentage of wearers increasing with wealth. Which is why you should consider a new time piece from RumbaTime’s Bowery watch collection.

The collection was inspired by RumbaTime owner Drew Deters’ trip to Japan and the natural elements of bamboo and earth tones that pepper the landscape and culture.

At first, I wasn’t crazy about the neutral color options the Bowery Collection was available in. But the Army Green band with leather accents grew on me and actually helped me figure out how to diversify my wardrobe around the watch. The watch made me want to wear brown shoes and earth tones so I could wear it.

My favorite part about the watch was the face. The face plate is a crisp white that pops and accents both the hands of the watch and the green line indices that denote the hours.

rumba_1

For the full review, click here.

  

Epic Video: Jeff Gordon Pranks Editor

Jeff Gordon Test Drive

The first time Pepsi Max did a hidden camera prank with NASCAR legend Jeff Gordon, one unsuspecting used car salesman unintentionally helped create one of the best viral videos ever.

Gordon teamed up again with Pepsi MAX to pull a prank on an unsuspecting automotive journalist who had questioned the authenticity of the original “Test Drive.”

Check out “Test Drive 2″ below:

  

Packers Clay Matthews talks Campbell’s Chunky Soup, his badass DNA and great hair

ClayMatthewsChunkSoup

Clay Matthews could definitely steal my girlfriend and probably yours too, bud. Upon scheduling this interview, my girlfriend did a quick Google search to put a face with the name.

As images of “The Clay Maker” flipped across her iPhone, she said, “Wow. This guy is a complete stud.” The accompanying far away look in her eyes told me all I needed to know; that if given the chance, she would shed me the way Matthews sheds opposing double teams.

Aside from getting the ladies flustered off the field, Matthews has established himself as the best pass rusher in the NFL, thanks to a successful start to his career that rivals any linebacker in NFL history.

In five seasons, Matthews has made the Pro Bowl four times, been selected as an All-Pro twice, been named NFC Defensive Player of the Year in 2010 and won Super Bowl XLV.

I was fortunate to speak with Clay about his career, his lineage and the Campbell’s Chunky “Sacks for Soup” campaign.

Talk about the partnership with Campbell’s Chunky Soup.

For the past year I teamed up with Campbell’s Chunky and created the “Sacks for Soup” campaign. For every sack that I was able to get last year, Campbell’s Chunky donated 2,000 cans of soup; 1,000 to a local Green Bay food bank and another 1,000 to the opposing team’s city. To date, we’ve donated over 40,000 cans of Chunky soup. For every sack, they also donated $1,000, so we were able to get around up to $20,000 for my foundation (CM3 Charitable Fund), so it’s been a fantastic campaign; one that not only provides for myself, but gives back in the process of doing so.

What’s your favorite kind?

My favorite kind thanks to the Green Bay weather and obviously a play on the Packers is the Hearty Cheeseburger. They’re all fantastic, so it’s hard to choose, but just like on the commercial, I like the Clam Chowder and the Spicy Quesadilla as well. They’re all really good, so I have to say all three.

I thought they’d make you a special kind called “Bear Chunks” for the way you’ve annihilated Chicago Bears quarterbacks in your career.

I’m willing to try! I don’t know if it would be a big seller, but I’d be all for it.

Click here for the full interview.

  

Pornhub Streams World’s Smutty Search Terms in Real Time

PornMD

Pornhub impresses me more and more every day. I mean, every “couple of months”, honey.

Not only are they not afraid to peddle smut, but they do it with accompanying analytics! Between smut and analytics, I’m not sure what gets my bandwith more close to maximum capacity.

“2 Very Boobs Homemade Gay Chat,” “Hentai Princess,” “Granny Perverz” – no, these aren’t the ramblings of a sex-crazed psychopath. Believe it or not, these are some of the world’s search terms that are currently being entered into PornMD, a search term aggregator part of the Pornhub network of sites.

The tech experts at PornMD have managed to successfully integrate a brand new feature into the search aggregator site that provides a live feed of the world’s search terms, as an endless stream of smutty glory.

The hilarious live search stream can be controlled with “rewind” and “pause” buttons, and filtered to feature terms from”Straight,”
“Gay” and “Tranny” categories.

Here’s the link for you to check out: http://www.pornmd.com/live-search

  

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